Dear Woman,

   Young woman, if you are not a virtuous woman, seek to become one.  Find a virtuous woman, though they are not easy to come by, and admire her for your own sake.  Consider her ways and follow them.  I speak as the husband of a Proverbs 31 woman.  I speak as one who has found a virtuous woman, whose worth is far above that of precious stones.  My heart trusts in her and my children and I rise up and call her blessed.  

   My desire for this text is for other women to hear that there is nothing more powerful than a virtuous woman.  If you are older and have passed up on being virtuous, repent and become so.  If you are younger and bewildered by the different directions a modern woman can take, search no more.  A virtuous woman is the only thing of value you can become, of utmost value, I must add.  What is a capable woman if she is not virtuous?  Oh woman, do not settle for the vanity of self-gratification.  There is nothing less beautiful than a beautiful woman worshipping herself.  You know it is true, don't you?  My daughters sing this verse, and it is daily confirmed as true in our home..."A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones."  How often do you dry up people's bones?  Stop it!  Please!  It is nauseating to hear a woman criticize, especially when she disguises it with a fake smile.  It is putrid to hear a woman, any woman, gossip and try to exalt herself by putting others down.  This is especially repugnant when she has the audacity to preface her criticism with "I am not one to gossip, but..." or "There are not many people I don't like, but..."

   Did you know that Proverbs says, "It is better for a man to live in the corner of a rooftop than in a large house with a contentious woman"?  Yes, it is true.  A woman can be poison... yes, the very stench of death to a man or to anyone around her.  Dear lady, if you have done these things or do these things, Stop it! Repent! Quit it! Don't do it anymore! And by the way, if you really want to know how bad you get sometimes, just ask around and dare them to be honest.  Don't trust yourself.  Don't flatter yourself by comparing yourself with other "ladies".  Don't excuse yourself either; don't deceive yourself.  On the other hand, don't worry.  The woman who does these things can resurrect by the power of God unto a complete restoration of her home.  She can seek virtue and find it.  She can exchange bitterness for joy.  Don't give up, dear heart.  God loves you, and he wants this for you.  He makes provision for your virtue.  Cease it and let it not go.  Repent from your evil ways and pursue the righteousness of true, virtuous womanhood in the Lord.  Whether you marry or not, you will be blessed and will impact the world more than you can even imagine.  

   What kind of woman are you?  This is NOT a simple question.  It would be simple if I were asking the ten people closest to you.  They would know how to answer.  I ask again, what kind of woman are you?  Do you even know?  Will you be honest?  I perceive that most women haven't a clue how self-absorbed they are and how damaging they are to others.  How about this question?  How many women have you been thinking about that need to read this?  If you are less than first in line, you are already deceived.  Do not be deceived.  Your heart is deceitful above all things, so why trust in your judgment concerning yourself?  Go ask God, I pray, that he would show you how unvirtuous you are.  "Lord, do I speak too much?  Really?  That much?  Do I criticize others?  Do I lie?  Do I dishonor?  Do I disrespect?  Do I dry up bones?  Do I worship myself?  Do I worship by body?  Am I a crown of glory to my husband or to my father?  Do I watch vanity?  Do I read vanity?  Do I fantasize?  Search me O Lord, and know my deepest thoughts and see if there be in me a self-glorifying, unvirtuous, hidden agenda in me.  Expose me, Lord, gently, and allow me to start anew and afresh as a daughter of the good King.  Nail my impurity to your cross and may I fear you as God, staying low in humility and seeking virtue unto your Glory all the days of my life."

   Dear woman, Fight for it.  Don't take it lightly.  It is worth it.  It is necessary.  Shine in the Lord and spare us all from the disgust and grief.  Find a virtuous woman and  become like her.  Perhaps the greatest verse and most applicable from all of Proverbs 31 is verse 30.  "Favor is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised."

Facebook

Hello everyone,

We've been asked quite often why we are so sluggish in joining facebook (or any social network).

To this point our answers as to why we haven't joined yet have been unclear at best. There are more or less particular reasons for our inactivity on the matter but none of them as simple and as clear as the fact that we are simply not interested in joining. If you are still curious as to why we choose not to, the most honest answer you will ever get is that we are truly and definitely and entirely uninterested. 

I even googled "facebook" images to maybe find something to go along with this post but all I got was a confirmation to my thoughts. I just couldn't care any less about it.  It makes me want to read Ecclesiastes again.

I hope this note finds you well. Please be challenged by it. From an exhorting brother to you!

Go read your Bible instead of updating your facebook account, for in it are the words of life.  Maybe you won't get as many people asking to be your friend, but you will be shocked beyond your wildest dreams at how content you can be without a single one of them (friends) when you find yourself staring at the fiercely compassionate face of the living God.

Quit inviting internet 'friends' to your web page rather than inviting  lost souls to the foot of the cross. 

I hope  you are sound enough to read in my voice that I am not condemning you for using facebook. I am simply stating two things. One, that I am not interested in joining facebook. And two, I am encouraging you to search your heart today. If facebook has become your idol, then yes, you are rebuked for it, and I plead that you relinquish its hold on you - for your sake and for His glory. On the other hand, if your idol is something completely different, then my rebuke is exactly the same. Mankind can get quite creative with his idolatry, but in reality they ALL fall in to the "and they worshipped 'other gods' " category.

Friends, if you claim to know Christ but your lives don't reflect it, please shiver in despair. God is not mocked.

Don't play!   I love you so very much. Don't play!

Cry out.

Busy or Reflective

Every time we go to Crawfordville we enjoy Heavy's Barbeque.  

There's no other place like it.  

You'll have to try it with us someday!

   Someone put the following words together, "Hurry is not of the devil; it IS the devil."  I was just now writing my brother-in-law thanking him for house and dog sitting this weekend while we enjoyed a few days away in small town Crawfordville, GA.  As I wrote him, these words flowed out: "Boy we had a good time relaxing in that small Georgia town this weekend. No TV, no internet.  It was pleasant to have less 'busy' time and more 'reflective' time.  And what was interesting is that we exerted more physical activity being less 'busy' and more 'reflective'."

   I am sure that you too have heard countless times lately how noisy, busy, fast-paced, cluttered, over-saturated modern life is, but the thing is, it is really that way.  Our family watched a mini-series recently called "The Frontier House" and it was about 3 families in 2001 going back in time for a 5-month period to the 1873 Montana Territory Homesteading.  It was a fascinating account. But, one of the most tragic moments in the 6 hours of footage was when one of the men felt like he was going to lose his mind when he returned to the 21st century and was bombarded by over stimulation of the senses when he spent a night on the town.  "So many lights, so many choices, so much noise."  It was rather depressing to watch him realize the futility of his life.  Oh that man would turn to God and find purpose.  

   I am rather nostalgic at heart, but this post has nothing to do with returning to simpler times for the sake of past glories, but rather for the sake of sanity and hearing the real voice of God. Dear friend, my encouragement to you today is that you unplug your ipod and everything else that that word stands for.

   -- Tim

"Mama, What does miserable mean?"

  The conversations that Tim and I have the privilege of having with our children are priceless. I should recount them more often and will try to do a better job of sharing some of them.

   Today Hannah, Lauren, and I were sitting at our kitchen table eating lunch as we do almost everyday.  Usually after one of the girls prays for "this good family, this good food, and for Papa to come home safe" we start praising the Lord. Sometimes we praise the Lord for "a warm house, good food to eat, a little brother" and sometimes we praise Him that He is "wonderful, almighty, amazing" and things like that.  It is a fun time to just praise the Lord together.  

   After praising the Lord together today, Hannah looked at me and asked, "Mama, What does miserable mean?"  I said, "Well, it means really bad."  I said, "If I am having a miserable day, then I am having a really bad day, or if I feel miserable, then I am feeling really bad."

Without skipping a beat she asked, "Do you feel miserable when you have a baby?" (she was referring to child birth).  I was surprised by her question because I did not know she knew at this point that there was pain associated with child birth.  I responded, "Yes, I do feel miserable" (thinking of having Timmy, an 8.5 lb. baby, by way of natural birth with no numbing medication - not my choice)  :)  She asked, "Why do you feel miserable?"  "Because it hurts," I answered. Again, "Why?" she asked.

   Ah ha.  This is where we have the choice to give one of two answers - the physical answer (which she is really not interested in at this point, thankfully... because I'm not sure how great of a job I would do explaining this to a 4-year old)  or the spiritual answer.  I opted for option #2 - the spiritual answer.  :)

   So, in answer to her question about why I feel miserable when I have a baby and why it hurts, I answered.... "Hannah, do you remember what Mama told you yesterday after you had disobeyed?  I told you that you can choose your sin but not your consequence."  She remembered that from yesterday.  You see, she had chosen to disobey and have a bad attitude (that was her choice), but then Tim and I chose her consequence (how she would be disciplined).  So, this explanation of sin and consequences was fresh in her little mind.

Then, I took her back to the story of Adam and Eve.  She reminded me of what they did and how they disobeyed God. You probably see where I am going with this.... sin... consequences...

I said, "Hannah, Eve chose to sin by disobeying God, but God got to choose her consequence.  One of her consequences was that every time she had a baby it would hurt really bad."  Hannah looked at me surprised.  I went on to explain, "And guess what?  Part of the consequence of Eve's sin was that it would hurt every lady that ever had a baby forever and ever."  Her mouth dropped open.  She was shocked.  "Why?" she asked.  I said, "God gets to choose our consequences... our punishment."  "So, that is the reason it hurts when Mama has a baby and that is why I feel miserable.  It is because of Eve's sin."  She understood this in relation to her sin and consequences yesterday afternoon.  She was not confused and accepted very well that God is in control and we are accountable to Him for everything.  I think she is beginning to grasp how our sin doesn't just affect us... it also affects those around us.

It is so beautiful to have these kinds of conversations with our kids. They truly are little sponges, and I pray that we are molding and shaping their hearts into the image of the Lord Jesus Christ.

Anniversary Addendum (by Tim)

Hello!                                  July 28th, 2008

Today is my 7 year anniversary. I celebrated this joyous event with my wife 

two days ago with our youngest son James, who is still in the womb. We love our  children to pieces, but we love each other more, so it was nice to just spend the day together. I was so honored that Allyson would take me on a man date and be such a great friend to have along. She didn't roll her eyes or criticize me when I got excited over the things we were doing. She didn't rush me nor did she tell me how much she would rather be shopping for herself. It was a very unusual date for a man to enjoy with his wife. You see, we spent the day learning about guns and shooting them at the range and then walking casually through Sportsmen's Warehouse looking at all the "grunt!, grunt!" man things to do outdoors.

I say it was unusual because, you tell me how many couples you know where the wife would ever take her husband out on a "man's date", much less on an important anniversary and even being five months pregnant. That was a royal treat for me. Not  so much the fact that the "man date" was fun, but far more so that my wife would honor me and enjoy me enough to initiate it and enjoy every moment of it herself. 

Thank you baby, for making me feel wanted, admired and respected.